*WARNING: this post contains adult content and examples of threat of rape and physical abuse*
Dear anyone who happens to find me sexually attractive; keep it to yourself, I don't want to know.
I've now been publicly online in my smalls for just over 3 years and I think it's about time I discussed the darker side of things.
I've had my photos shared, commented on and abused on (oh hi to the guy who said my parents should send me to fat camp because I'm a heart attack waiting to happen!), they've ended up on soft porn sites, used as advertising for 'Ugly Girls Need Love To' dating sites, various redhead appreciation facebook pages, fake profiles etc. This doesn't feel good. You literally have no control over where your image ends up any more.
Recently on checking the twitter feed of a troll I'd blocked a long time ago, I found this particular person had made some rather disgusting, sexual remarks regarding what they'd like to do to me and how they want my boyfriend to watch. I felt instantly disgusted and almost violated by the fact that someone who doesn't even know me could say such disrespectful things. Over on my ask.fm account I've had , dare I call them threats, from one man who was trolling me about feminism then decided he was going to 'rape my mouth' then behead me and display my head amongst other 'bitches' he deemed suitable for a similar treatment. He then went on to tell me how 'rape isn't that bad' and other things I won't repeat as they are far too sickening to even think about. I've been added to Pinterest boards such as 'I Would' 'Sexy Women' and horribly 'MILFs' (wtf?). I'm regularly told by men what they'd like to do to me ('I would destroy her p***y'!), particularly when I post photos of my latest pair of tights I want to share with the world. I've told the foot/tights fetishists numerous times to back off and stop trying to inflict their fetish on those who are not interested, but they never listen, just carry on asking silly questions about my feet, or what they want to do 'on' them. Yeah....how 'bout no?
Shocking, right? Only sadly it's not. It happens more often than I'd care to think. And this is the dark side of lingerie blogging, and often the dark side of simply being a woman.
The recent campaign #YesAllWomen was of great interest to me as a feminist and with it's slightly obscure hashtag it meant that I was asked by a few men what it meant. My best friend and boyfriend both agreed with the sentiment and both admitted they'll never know how it really feels to be a woman experiencing such things. If you're not familiar, in my own short words it means 'no, all men aren't threatening, whether it be sexually, physically or otherwise towards women, but #YesAllWomen feel the need to guard against it.' In my experiences online, I've found that women block men who send them sexual tweets, Facebook messages, etc, and often seek out the advice from other women to check if a man is a potential 'creeper' (or if a supposed woman is posing as a man, yes it happens) because it's what we're used to, that's what we have to guard against.
You could ask why I post photos of myself online in lingerie/tights/any clothing or why I have a public twitter account or ask.fm account if it bothers me so much, but to deny myself of these things would be denying myself the freedom to be me, and to invalidate the point of my blog which is to help other women with a similar body shape to find clothes and lingerie that fits.
It seems I can't even walk a mile down the road without a man beeping his horn at me, heckling me or in one disturbing case, appearing to follow me. I wasn't fully aware of how much this type of behaviour affected me until I want to a local hospital for a training session last week. I made sure I was wearing my headphones so I didn't have to hear the heckling and car horns, I made sure I was walking fast to get through an area of high hedges, I made sure I carried my phone in a position I could use it as a weapon should I need to...
I shouldn't have to check myself in case some creepy guy decides what I'm doing is sexual. I shouldn't have to cut my head off my photos to prevent them being shared on soft porn sites. I shouldn't be made to feel apprehensive about blogging about tights I was sent to review. I shouldn't be made to feel like an object because a few guys find me attractive and want to tell me what they'd like to d to me. But I AM. And that's why #YesAllWomen is important to me.
I'd love to hear your experiences of online abuse and the steps you feel the need to take to avoid this. Please comment below, and remember, don't let the minority ruin things for us all x
(And yes, I'm fully expecting backlash. I won't engage, sorry trolls!)
Friday, 20 June 2014
Wednesday, 7 May 2014
Emerald City; Sparkling With Amy Childs Collection Jasmine Dress
Firstly, I must apologise for my lack of blogging. Admittedly I am a hoarder of notable proportions, so continuing to blog regularly isn't helping my hoarding as this type of blogging relies on me buying clothes and lingerie, and well, I now have a HUGE excess of clothes!
Okay, now that's out of the way, I'll begin! Back in December I had the honour of attending my the Christmas party of my boyfriend's workplace, and of course I needed (and I use the word loosely) a new dress for the occasion. I narrowed my shortlist down to three and purchased, rather typically, the cheapest, a different dress to the one I'm reviewing today which I may review at a later date. After the Christmas Party, I couldn't stop thinking about the 'reject' dresses on my shortlist, notably the gorgeous Jasmine by Amy Childs. Then, tah-dahhh, it appeared for half price in the sale for £37.50 on the Amy Childs Official site! I used the poor excuse that "I need a dress for Valentine's night" to justify my purchase! Unfortunately the green has since sold out, but it's available in red here.
Now I'm not some kind of TOWIE fangirl, not by a long shot. In fact, I've never even seen the show and only vaguely know what it is, but I do admire Amy Childs' curves and her confidence to rock them. Here's Amy totally rocking the Jasmine dress.
*When purchasing from a brand new to yourself it's always worth checking online first for reviews on sizing and fit. That way you're less likely to have to deal with returns and disappointment. Just a little tip for you there ;o)
Onto the dress!
As I mentioned above, I checked reviews of this dress and many, if not all of them said to size up, so I ordered a size 10. When I tried the dress on it was still quite a squeeze, so when I say size up, REALLY do. Either go one size up for a snug fit or two up for a more comfortable fit. I can't comment on the fitting of this dress two sizes up (which would have been a size 12 for me) but I imagine it would have been a good fit on me.
I would recommend wearing a WYOB (Wear Your Own Bra) shapewear slip under this to make it easier to zip up, and because it's a fitted dress. If you don't have one, there are hundreds on eBay. I chose a M&S one in my usual dress size and it works perfectly. The bra I chose was an old faithful Freya Deco as it has a seamless appearance and gives a good shape.
Jasmine is a real head turner of a dress, covered in green matte sequins for a more sophisticated sparkle. It has the added detail of a spot of ruching to nip you in at the waist a bit more and create more of a curvy outline and sits at a nice length on me, just below my knee. I'm 5'2" for reference. I love the asymmetrical neckline, but be warned, you risk flashing a bra strap, so choose your lingerie wisely. Although the dress is fully lined, you still risk getting a few scratches from the sequins, so bear that in mind before you buy.
As much as I love this dress, it doesn't come without a couple of issues. Firstly, the sizing as I've discussed already. It's a real annoyance to have to buy different sizes. Secondly, it doesn't offer a lot of stretch in the boob department and I was on the borderline of looking like I'd really squashed my boobs into the dress. And thirdly, the armholes are a bit bigger than I'd hoped for, thus flashing a bit of bra. It's nothing you busty ladies won't be familiar with.
If you've fallen in love with this dress in green, I apologise for not posting this review sooner and advise you to regularly check eBay as Amy's dresses are popping up on there all the time. I must admit I was slightly disappointed with the lack of boob room since Amy is very busty herself, but if you look through the Amy Childs Official store I'm sure you'll find something you'll love!
Okay, now that's out of the way, I'll begin! Back in December I had the honour of attending my the Christmas party of my boyfriend's workplace, and of course I needed (and I use the word loosely) a new dress for the occasion. I narrowed my shortlist down to three and purchased, rather typically, the cheapest, a different dress to the one I'm reviewing today which I may review at a later date. After the Christmas Party, I couldn't stop thinking about the 'reject' dresses on my shortlist, notably the gorgeous Jasmine by Amy Childs. Then, tah-dahhh, it appeared for half price in the sale for £37.50 on the Amy Childs Official site! I used the poor excuse that "I need a dress for Valentine's night" to justify my purchase! Unfortunately the green has since sold out, but it's available in red here.
Now I'm not some kind of TOWIE fangirl, not by a long shot. In fact, I've never even seen the show and only vaguely know what it is, but I do admire Amy Childs' curves and her confidence to rock them. Here's Amy totally rocking the Jasmine dress.
*When purchasing from a brand new to yourself it's always worth checking online first for reviews on sizing and fit. That way you're less likely to have to deal with returns and disappointment. Just a little tip for you there ;o)
Onto the dress!
As I mentioned above, I checked reviews of this dress and many, if not all of them said to size up, so I ordered a size 10. When I tried the dress on it was still quite a squeeze, so when I say size up, REALLY do. Either go one size up for a snug fit or two up for a more comfortable fit. I can't comment on the fitting of this dress two sizes up (which would have been a size 12 for me) but I imagine it would have been a good fit on me.
I would recommend wearing a WYOB (Wear Your Own Bra) shapewear slip under this to make it easier to zip up, and because it's a fitted dress. If you don't have one, there are hundreds on eBay. I chose a M&S one in my usual dress size and it works perfectly. The bra I chose was an old faithful Freya Deco as it has a seamless appearance and gives a good shape.
Jasmine is a real head turner of a dress, covered in green matte sequins for a more sophisticated sparkle. It has the added detail of a spot of ruching to nip you in at the waist a bit more and create more of a curvy outline and sits at a nice length on me, just below my knee. I'm 5'2" for reference. I love the asymmetrical neckline, but be warned, you risk flashing a bra strap, so choose your lingerie wisely. Although the dress is fully lined, you still risk getting a few scratches from the sequins, so bear that in mind before you buy.
I don't have scoliosis by the way, I'm just standing wonkily!
As much as I love this dress, it doesn't come without a couple of issues. Firstly, the sizing as I've discussed already. It's a real annoyance to have to buy different sizes. Secondly, it doesn't offer a lot of stretch in the boob department and I was on the borderline of looking like I'd really squashed my boobs into the dress. And thirdly, the armholes are a bit bigger than I'd hoped for, thus flashing a bit of bra. It's nothing you busty ladies won't be familiar with.
If you've fallen in love with this dress in green, I apologise for not posting this review sooner and advise you to regularly check eBay as Amy's dresses are popping up on there all the time. I must admit I was slightly disappointed with the lack of boob room since Amy is very busty herself, but if you look through the Amy Childs Official store I'm sure you'll find something you'll love!
Friday, 31 January 2014
My top Valentine's Day picks for 2014
Love it or hate it, St. Valentine's Day is fast approaching. Single or not, what better way to treat yourself than with a new lingerie set (and maybe a big tub of ice cream...)! Using my favourite online retailers I've put together a collection of my top picks for this February 14th.
The latest trend in lingerie seems to be straps. Straps everywhere! The Entice Alexa set from Figleaves Boudoir is a perfect example of this. It's strapping details hints cheekily towards bondage whilst remaining classy. The bra comes in XS-L suggesting it's not meant to be a functional piece and rather one for, ahem, 'bedroom wear'.
Priced from £14 to 34 per piece in red or black and consisting of an unpadded bra, thong, brief and suspender belt it's above my budget for something that lacks functionality. However, for that special occasion it's rather stunning!
If the Entice Alexa from Figleaves is your kind of thing but you can't quite bring yourself to part with over £60, how about a detachable choker strap from Esty Lingerie? These straps simply attach to your bra band at the central gore and range from just £5.49 to £19.99. They add a subtly sexy rock/bondage look to any outfit and are really quite unique!
Not sure? Check out the reviews from The Full Figured Chest, The Undercover Lingerista and Of Lambs and Lace.
Sadly this sexy slip is old stock and doesn't come in a large range of sizes (32-26 B-E) but if you're lucky or willing to sister size you might be able to find this at a bargain price. Gossard are currently selling this at £35 knocked down from £59.00. The slip can be paired with any black thong so you don't even have to buy the matching one.
Photo courtesy of Gossard
I love the contrasting lace bra section and the sheer polka dot slip. It's functional too, useful as shapewear and with foam padded plunge cups it'll boost your bangers for a WOW cleavage!
I love the contrasting lace bra section and the sheer polka dot slip. It's functional too, useful as shapewear and with foam padded plunge cups it'll boost your bangers for a WOW cleavage!
The only set in my Valetine's selection I actually own is the decadent Charlotte. I bought her from LargeCupLingerie a few months ago and have only worn her a handful of times. I have this weird OCD thing about 'special' sets and sadly rarely get to wear them because of that reason! Although I've not yet reviewed the set, you may have seen my selfie on Twitter a while back.
The set is sexy, supportive and high quality, so you really feel you've treated yourself should you choose to buy it. I found the cups on the small side so I bought a 28H and the thong is a Large. The padded cups quite shallow and didn't give me any cleavage, which is forgiveable since the set is so nice! The band is firm and VERY wide as are the fully adjustable straps, which can only be a good thing if you have a large bust.
I bought my Charlotte set in Red but it's also available in Peach and Dusty Rose. Charlotte costs £30 for the bra, £12 for the brief and £14 for the high waisted shorts here at LargeCupLingerie. Charlotte comes in sizes 28-40 D-K, the best size range I've seen in a long time!
Long standing readers of my blog will know I'm a huge fan of Curvy Kate's Tease Me, and when they released the autumn/winter colour way of black and scarlet I knew I had to have it.
At £29 for the bra, £13.50 for the thong and £15.50 for the shorts it's not the biggest bargain but I do love Tease Me so I'll be buying mine from Debenhams shortly. The set can also be found at Brastop for the same price but most sizes are now out of stock. *Don't forget that if you can, try a band size smaller and two cups larger. If it's not possible to downsize a band or you like a looser fit then just go up one cup size.* Tease me comes in sizes 28-30 D-J, 32 D-HH, 34 D-H, 36 D-GG and 38 D-GG but the above retailers don't have all sizes left.
*Edit* Curvy Kate have kindly informed me that this version of Tease Me now runs true to size, so it's advised that you order your usual size.
Brand new from Curvy Kate is the pretty pink long line Carmen. This is the first long line bra Curvy Kate have produced and with it's padded cups with pale yellow embroidery I'm sure it will be a hit! In sizes 28-38 D-J Curvy Kate have made sure all their usual customer base won't miss out.
Carmen is a three part set consisting of the long line bra £35, suspender belt £18, and thong £15 or shorts £16. All can be purchased at Brastop. If pink isn't your thing wait until AW14 range when Curvy Kate will be producing it in black. I'm sure you'll agree it's fabulous!
This may not be the obvious choice for Valentine's Day so let me explain. My boyfriend ADORES yellow. His bathroom is yellow, his kitchen is yellow including ALL appliances. He loves it. Yellow isn't a colour often found in lingerie, particularly in the market for larger cup sizes. When I came across this fun set from Made In Preston my heart skipped a beat on his behalf!
In a good size range of (yes, a 26" band!) 26-30 DD-J, 32-36 DD-H and 38 DD-GG, Made In Preston have really pushed the boat out to ensure a lot of large busted women are included. My only complaint about this is that they are charging a higher price of £38.95 for 26 bands! It seems ridiculous to charge for the smallest and most niche of band sizes when they already have the patterns cut for all the advertised sizes. All other sizes cost £34 and the matching knickers are £8.95. I don't know if the bra is padded or not and with Made In Preston being new to lingerie, I can't advise on fit I'm afraid.
Will you be buying yourself lingerie for St Valentine's Day? Let me know your favourites by commenting below!
Monday, 27 January 2014
The Super Sweet Sophia by Tutti Rouge
,A while back you may remember me trying out new big cup lingerie brand Tutti Rouge's Liliana and Betty bras, but sadly neither worked on me. I was contacted by the lovely Jessica from Tutti Rouge who then offered me the chance to try the beautiful Sophia, as she seemed adamant on me becoming a 'Tutti Rougette'!
After some too-ing and fro-ing (are they even words? No..) we finally hit the nail on the head with this set! First I tried the Sophia in a 28H as this seemed to be the correct cup size for me in the Liliana and Betty, but it was far too big in this style as you can see in the photo below.
I was then sent my recommended Sophia size of a 28G and it's near perfect! My only quibbles are that the half adjustable straps are a bit too long, but I can easily shorten them, and like all the Tutti Rouge bras I've tried so far, the cups appear to have a shallow part right at the bottom of them, creating an unusual 'dent' in the underside of the bust. It's not really visible in my photos as I couldn't quite manage to photograph it accurately. If you look at the bottom on the cups in the shots of the pink Sophia above and the green below you should be able to see what I mean.
The band is nice and snug and the bra is oozing with all of Tutti Rouge's usual sweet little details such as the embossed branding at the hooks, heart shaped adjusters and a little bow and button to the central gore. The bra is lightly padded and has a contrast in textures between the satin cup and double mesh layer of the upper cup, helping keep everything in place.
I won't go into great detail but a mix up over brief colours resulted in me getting the set in this gorgeous shade of mint, the likes of which my lingerie drawer has never seen before! Here I'm wearing a medium in the retro brief. I was also sent a thong in the same size and they're both spot on. For reference I usually wear Primark pants in a size 16-18, Freya Deco shorts in a Medium and Deco thongs in a Large. There's very little difference in the look of the brief and the thong at the front, but the back of the brief has a bit of ruching, a keyhole and a couple of little bows. Very cute!
Sophia is currently retailing at around £16 in various sales such as LargeCupLingerie and is also available here on the Tutti Rouge website.
I've not worn Sophia for any long periods of time as yet since I've not managed to find the time to alter the straps but as first impressions go, Sophia seems to be pretty good for me and I've decided not give up on Tutti Rouge just yet!
Have you ever been put off a brand you were really looking forward to trying?
Friday, 3 January 2014
HATTY New Year!
Aside from my extensive collection of lingerie I'm also a bit of a hoarder of hats. Being a total wuss who feels the cold at the very sound of the word 'winter', they also serve a more practical use. My 'hatspiration' is definitely Gwen Stefani who rocks a slouchy beanie like nobody else, see? I adore this woman!
Anyway, I was recently contacted by Ricefield Collective who offered me a hat of my choice in exchange for a blog post, which I naturally didn't refuse! I chose the simple 'Dreamer' hat in Peacoat, a navy blue and off-white knit.
Priced at $36 (plus a $10 shipping fee outside of the USA), £27 is a bit more than I'd usually pay for a hat. However, Ricefield Collective are a far cry from your average company...
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Ifugao knitters in indigenous dress
Who are Ricefield Collective?
Ricefield Collective hats and accessories are hand knitted by women in the Ifugao region of the Philippines. The idea was born when Meredith Ramirez Talusan visited Ifugao in 2011 and learned that locals were being forced to abandon their communities in order to seek higher wages in larger cities. Meredith then decided to help the women by teaching them to knit, the products of which they could then sell on to tourists to supplement their income. Ricefield Collective successfully funded their project via a Kickstarter campaign in April 2011 and thus, an Ifugao knitting school and wonderfully ethical company was born!
Not only do they knit, they also model! Marietta models the 'Upward' hat she knitted
Made with love
My hat was beautifully packaged in a cloth dust bag with a photograph of the lady who'd knitted it! I loved this idea as it somehow made me happy knowing it wasn't made by a faceless machine and that someone who had spent hours hand knitting that very hat I was holding! Thank you Maricel!
Quite different than my usual reviews, and much more straight forward! I have quite a small head so most 'loose fit' beanies are baggy enough to keep me happy, and with it's soft blend of premium American wool and Alpaca wool it's comfortable and warm to wear.
Thanks for your wool sweet Alpaca!
What's a blog post from me without at least one self indulgent shot?!
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I see Ricefield Collective almost as a charity. You're donating to a good cause to empower a group of women to stay on their ancestral land, the Banaue Rice Terraces (a UNESCO Heritage Site) AND you're getting an awesome, hand-crafted hat to boot!
Happy New Year readers!
Wednesday, 13 November 2013
My love for Morticia
Widely tipped as being THE corset to own, the best selling Morticia underbust corset by What Katie Did has been firmly wedged on my wish list for quite some time now. With it's gored hips and extreme wasp waist, the Morticia is recommended for those who possess a 'vintage' hourglass figure with a large difference between the waist and hip measurements, preferably 10 inches or more.
A few months ago I came across one on eBay for £100, £59 below the RRP, so I went ahead and bought it. I went for the 22" as my 25" waist sits awkwardly between sizes 20" and 22". Sadly, when it arrived, it was too big and the gap at the back of the corset was fully closed, offering no potential for waist training or reduction. This was a very sad day for me because as soon as I'd unwrapped the pretty peach corset, I'd fallen in love with it instantly.
As you can see from the photos, the colour married beautifully with my icy blue Masquerade Rhea (Bravissimo exclusive colour way, no longer available) set. Despite the corset being too big, I still felt it had given me some shape at least, but I couldn't justify spending that amount of money on something that wasn't absolutely perfect.
I continued to search eBay on at least a weekly basis for a Morticia in a 20", then lo and behold, last week, there she was! Admittedly not in the beautiful peach of my previous purchase nor the super practical black I coveted, but in white satin. I was willing to overlook the Colorado on account of the price, just £60! The seller was only asking this amount because it was being sold without laces, something I managed to pick up for £4 from another eBay seller. So for the grand total of £70 including postage and laces, I became the very happy and proud owner of a brand new sparkling white Morticia!
As soon as she arrived, I unwrapped her; the seller had placed her in silver tissue paper inside a leopard print carrier bag, which added to the enjoyment of purchasing such an item of luxury. I took my laces and set to work with the aid of thisYouTube video to help me properly lace up my new baby. With a little tugging and adjustment, she was on, and boy was I impressed! Instant reduction, instant Jessica Rabbit curves! BAM!
Of course, corseting with an off-the-shelf number can come with its problems, and for me it was a slight discomfort of my floating ribs (the very bottom set). However, I'm pretty certain that given proper waist training I could overcome this quite easily. My problem is that I want it all and now, so in the photo I'd laced it up as tight as I could to see what kind of reduction I could gain. I'm pretty sure you'll agree that it's rather impressive! Here's the back;
You can really feel the quality of the Morticia, and the structure is quite a feat of engineering. Somehow the Morticia has that perfect balance between hardcore structuring and slightly pliable comfort. Perfection!
I'm wearing Morticia with Curvy Kate's Tease Me set, available in a variety of colours from Brastop.
You can really feel the quality of the Morticia, and the structure is quite a feat of engineering. Somehow the Morticia has that perfect balance between hardcore structuring and slightly pliable comfort. Perfection!
I'm wearing Morticia with Curvy Kate's Tease Me set, available in a variety of colours from Brastop.
I adore the figure corsets give me and I'm more than tempted to give waist training a try, but for now I'm happy to just get my Morticia out whenever I need a reminder of exactly how awesome I can look with a little help!
Friday, 25 October 2013
Lady V London's new collection!
So enthused was I on seeing Lady V London's new collection that I felt the need to write a post on them!
Relatively new to them is the gorgeous Roxie Rocks dress, with 3/4 sleeved mock wrap top section and swing skirt, it's ideal for all those Christmas parties you're all thinking about at this time of the year. It comes in red with black trim, black with red trim, purple with white trim and teal with white trim. I will say that I've tried this dress (but unfortunately didn't photograph myself in it) and was really disappointed with the sizing ON ME. It was just too big in the shoulders, a problem I often have with dresses and shirts on account of my petite frame. Roxie Rocks costs £40 and comes in sizes 8-22 and is made from a luxurious stretch satin type fabric.
Another new addition is the HD Swing Dress, which is the same as the previous range of swing dresses only it has the added detail of a contrast trim, which I'm a total sucker for! My favourite is the white with black polka dot, I'd wear it with red accessories as always. Priced at £45, the HD Swing Dress comes in a range of fabrics in sizes 8-22 and come with a matching headband too!
Next up, the delicious Dolly Darling. In sizes 8-26/28 and 5 different colours with contrasting trim and waist bow, you can turn yourself into a 50's pin up for just £45! My personal favourite is the Cobalt Blue, it's so pretty!
For those of you who prefer a less revealing neckline, how about Lady V's range of pretty Day Dresses? I LOVE the folded neckline and v-neck back. They cost just £30 and come in sizes 8-20 in a satisfying range of colours and prints.
Saving the best until last, Behold the AMAZING Isabella Dress! Drooooool...Erm, yes, I'm a sucker for polka dots AND red AND bows, and this particular dress has it all! It's sweetheart neckline and swing skirt are very similar to another favourite of mine, the Pinup Girl Clothing Heidi, so it's nice to have a cheaper alternative. Isabella is offered with 1/2 sleeves in purple (below), blue and black, and cap sleeves in Mocha polka dot, black with pink trim and black/white polka dot with red trim, comes in sizes 8-20/22 and costs £40.
My only bugbear is that looking at the measurements, none of the Lady V dresses will fit me without alteration as the waist measurements generally come up between 1 and 3 inches bigger than my own. For this I'm GUTTED, but still very tempted to get this Isabella and have it altered.
For a limited time only (and I have no idea how long the offer is on) you can get a generous 15% off your entire order with Lady V London using the discount code WOW15 at checkout. GO!
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